I remember years ago when my friend Vivien described the mess she and her husband made while trying to lay carpet in a bathroom. She said, "People like Tom and me shouldn't own houses." That comment has stayed with me for over thirty years. I'm convinced that I am also one of those people.
My pear tree needed some pruning, so I decided to take down some of the lower and smaller limbs. I used my hand saw, and got most of them removed. Using my handsaw and pruning shears, I was able to cut most of those branches down enough to fit into the required receptacles for town removal. One branch was just too much, so I decided to buy a chainsaw.
I've used a chainsaw before. I borrowed one from Sandy C., and it worked great. However, all I needed to do with hers was plug it in. My new one had to be oiled. The chain had to be adjusted. I had to follow directions. I am not good at following directions, especially when the directions are written in a way that assumes one is somewhat familiar with the basic principles of tools.
I went to school before shop became co-ed. I am not familiar with anything mechanical. The simplest mechanical concepts are hieroglyphics to me.
Who knew an electrical saw would need oil? Not me. So, I had to run out to Wal Mart and buy the specific oil needed and a funnel. Let me give you all a money saving tip. If you ever need a funnel, do NOT buy it in the hardware department. There, a simple funnel set of two is $4.98. Go to the housewares department where a funnel set is $.98. Yes, a four dollar difference!
I picked up my oil and funnels and headed to the car. Don't ask me how I did it, but I tripped over my own feet and went sliding into home base. Luckily, my face wasn't beat up and nothing was broken. But, my right arm is skinned like a squirrel in an Appalachian kitchen. Let me take a moment to thank the Lord that nothing was broken and that some of the bystanders kindly came to my rescue. Thumbs up for the people of Wal Mart!
I got home and assembled my tools. The directions showed me where to add the oil. They cautioned me not to overfill the tank. Jeezy peezy...I had a big bottle of oil. Who knew the chainsaw tank was so small? So yes, I made a freakin' mess.
After a few cuts with the saw (and yes, I used safety glasses), I was proud of myself for recognizing that the chain needed to be adjusted.
And that's where it all went wrong.
Seriously, I looked at the pictures. I read the directions. I really, really thought I was doing it right. Until everything just fell apart in my lap, and I couldn't put it back together again. I was supposed to loosen some screws, not remove them. And that, dear friends, was my downfall. After too much cussing for a Sunday afternoon, I gathered all of the parts, put everything together in a box, and shelved the darn thing. Hopefully, the man who mows my lawn will be able to reassemble it for me.
I am not even going to state the obvious. Oh hell, yes I am!
If I had a husband, none of this would have happened. Well, that is unless I had Vivien's husband. 'Cause he, too, is one of those people who just shouldn't own a house.
Sunday, April 14, 2013
Friday, April 12, 2013
Books I've Enjoyed
Since retiring, I've read a lot of books. I don't sit around all day with my nose stuck in a book because there are always a bunch of things to do that draw me away. However, when a book grabs me, really grabs me, the rest of the world just has to wait. Today I'll share some of my favorites with you. I don't know if any of these ever made the bestseller list, but they should have.
One Good Dog by Susan Wilson
In this book, the chapters alternate as the human man, Adam, relates his tale of woe, and the human-like dog, Chance, tells his. The human had a high-pressure and prestigious job, until the day he flipped out and smacked his secretary. Bye bye life as he knew it. The dog escaped from a dog-fighting ring and was left to figure out his way on the mean city streets. Man meets dog, and their story truly begins. I am cautious about recommending this to just anybody because the descriptions of the fighting rings are so graphic, you have to have a strong stomach for some of it. Those who know me, know that my gut lurches pretty easily in response to gross stuff. However, I could not put down this book! (And, after it, I knew I could never forgive Michael Vick.) If you've ever loved a dog, read this.
If you try this book and you like it, then follow up with : Racing in the Rain: My Life as a Dog by Garth Stein.
=====================================================
Elizabeth Street by Laurie Fabiano
I've always loved immigrant stories, especially those related to the Jewish and Italian ghettos in New York City in the early twentieth century. Fabiano's novel is based on her family's history and the stories about the life of her grandmother, Giovanna, as she established her family in Little Italy. And as she went up against organized crime in order to do so. I reached one part in particular that boggled my mind as I realized it really did happen! This book will engage the reader and take you back in time. You'll see the dusty streets, hear the voices of a city crammed with people, feel the oppressive heat, and smell the cooking that fills the tenement brownstones. On a trip to NYC, I searched out the streets mentioned in the book. Wonderful family saga, read it!
If you like this book, you may also enjoy: Brooklyn: A Novel by Colm Toibin or Evergreen by Belva Plain.
=====================================================
All the Numbers by Judy Merrill Larsen
This is Judy Larsen's first novel, and I can't wait to read another by her. The book opens during summer vacation; the families are spending lazy days by the water, the music is playing, the Jet Skis are buzzing, the sun is shining, and it's heaven on Earth. The setting reminded me of some people at my pool. The families share a spot in the back corner. The adults are around the same age, and they have children who play with each other. Peaceful happy times. However, in Larsen's book, one halcyon day has a tragic ending that shatters their summer tranquility and pits family against family. I wanted to step into the book and hug the mother most tragically decimated by this catastrophe. It's well-written, wrenching, and riveting. You'll never forget this book. I promise.
If you like this book, you might also enjoy anything written by Jodi Picoult. She's had a lot of bestsellers!
=====================================================
Let me know if I encouraged you to read any of these books. I'm always anxious to hear what others think. Would you like me to recommend more books? Is there any genre you really like? Any type of story you'd like to find? I will gladly recommend more! I'm convinced that in my other life I was a librarian.
One Good Dog by Susan Wilson
In this book, the chapters alternate as the human man, Adam, relates his tale of woe, and the human-like dog, Chance, tells his. The human had a high-pressure and prestigious job, until the day he flipped out and smacked his secretary. Bye bye life as he knew it. The dog escaped from a dog-fighting ring and was left to figure out his way on the mean city streets. Man meets dog, and their story truly begins. I am cautious about recommending this to just anybody because the descriptions of the fighting rings are so graphic, you have to have a strong stomach for some of it. Those who know me, know that my gut lurches pretty easily in response to gross stuff. However, I could not put down this book! (And, after it, I knew I could never forgive Michael Vick.) If you've ever loved a dog, read this.
If you try this book and you like it, then follow up with : Racing in the Rain: My Life as a Dog by Garth Stein.
=====================================================
Elizabeth Street by Laurie Fabiano
I've always loved immigrant stories, especially those related to the Jewish and Italian ghettos in New York City in the early twentieth century. Fabiano's novel is based on her family's history and the stories about the life of her grandmother, Giovanna, as she established her family in Little Italy. And as she went up against organized crime in order to do so. I reached one part in particular that boggled my mind as I realized it really did happen! This book will engage the reader and take you back in time. You'll see the dusty streets, hear the voices of a city crammed with people, feel the oppressive heat, and smell the cooking that fills the tenement brownstones. On a trip to NYC, I searched out the streets mentioned in the book. Wonderful family saga, read it!
If you like this book, you may also enjoy: Brooklyn: A Novel by Colm Toibin or Evergreen by Belva Plain.
=====================================================
All the Numbers by Judy Merrill Larsen
This is Judy Larsen's first novel, and I can't wait to read another by her. The book opens during summer vacation; the families are spending lazy days by the water, the music is playing, the Jet Skis are buzzing, the sun is shining, and it's heaven on Earth. The setting reminded me of some people at my pool. The families share a spot in the back corner. The adults are around the same age, and they have children who play with each other. Peaceful happy times. However, in Larsen's book, one halcyon day has a tragic ending that shatters their summer tranquility and pits family against family. I wanted to step into the book and hug the mother most tragically decimated by this catastrophe. It's well-written, wrenching, and riveting. You'll never forget this book. I promise.
If you like this book, you might also enjoy anything written by Jodi Picoult. She's had a lot of bestsellers!
=====================================================
Let me know if I encouraged you to read any of these books. I'm always anxious to hear what others think. Would you like me to recommend more books? Is there any genre you really like? Any type of story you'd like to find? I will gladly recommend more! I'm convinced that in my other life I was a librarian.
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