I was chatting today with an acquaintance I hadn't seen in twenty some years. Obviously, we were much older than when we last saw each other, but we were certainly recognizable. Our hair is still brown; maybe hers is natural, but mine comes out of a box. Her face looked great, skin still as smooth as a peach. I look a little apricoty, if I do say so myself. One thing we always had in common was our weight, and the never ending battle to keep it under control. However, she made a comment that bothered me and got me to thinking. She refuses to wear a bathing suit. This woman loves the water and spent many, many days sunbathing at the beach. Now, as our days grow shorter and the time we have left on this earth to do what we enjoy is waning , she is too embarrassed to wear a swimsuit and do what she once enjoyed. (Did I mention we were at a memorial service for a man who would have given anything just to plop his weathered old body into a Speedo and drink his rum and Diet Cokes at Rehoboth Beach one more time?) I hope I got through to her. Seriously, we look like grandmas. Who's even paying attention to us at the pool, the beach, the hot tub? Wear that bathing suit, dammit!
We will not live forever. And even if we do get close to forever, we will probably not have the healthy mobility to do what we want.
I hate the term "bucket list." I don't know why, I just do. My friend Dottie and I used to call it "The List," and we'd congratulate each other when we checked something off of it. I recently checked something off my list, a trip to Cuba.
There's a difference between traveling and vacationing. Traveling can be hard work. Our first day in Cuba included three tours in 95-100 degree weather with humidity, stifling humidity. We visited a cemetery known for its white tombs, and the sun that blindingly reflected from them. I was melting like butter on toast. But I kept up with them! I was not going to waste the tour cowering under some skinny tree and looking longingly at the air-conditioned bus. Tour Two took us to an art museum. The guide warned us that the elevator was not working, no surprise in a third world country. Three of the five in our group opted to stay on the air-conditioned bus. My friend, Liane, and I trudged the trail until we got to the top of the museum. Our guide gave us a personal tour and explained the local art. I am forever thankful for his insight, and the very special opportunity we were given. Some years ago I weighed more than I do now, and I might not have made it up the various levels. Some year from now, I may have to be the one who stays on the bus because I just can't do it. But, I could do it that day, and I did! That night was our third walking tour. My legs ached. My feet were killing me. But the fresh mojito at Hemingway's favorite bar kept me going. More walking and climbing the next day, but hey, we saw Hemingway's Havana house! It was a fabulous trip.
When I got home, I gave in to the sheer exhaustion. Lots of sleep. Lots of OTC pain relievers. Lots of blisters. My bad knee became gangster naughty, locking up on me, threatening to send me flying across the floor, and causing me to use a cane for a while. ( It's very hard for me to get up when I fall flat on my face. Don't ask me how I know.) I don't remember being in this much pain when I returned from a three week European tour when I was in my thirties.
It was a short trip, and it took a lot out of me. But, I will gladly go back and spend more time in that hot humid country if given the chance. Because I realize, I'm getting older; good health is no longer something to take for granted, and life is offering more opportunities than I will ever be able to enjoy. I'll don my ugly walking shoes, wear my goofy sunblocking hat, and push myself as long and hard as I am able. For I know many who are no longer able, and none of them thought it would happen so soon. You only live once. Don't let some candles on a cake determine what you can or cannot do.
Take that trip. March on Washington. Play that piano. Learn to paint. Take dance lessons. Learn to ride a bike. Wear that bathing suit.
Live!
